The connector symbols can be used for any connector footprint. There should be quite a few different options in the official lib and without more detail we can not really help you narrow down the options.
All footprints for connectors in the official library should be in libraries starting with “Connector_”. (For example Connector_Molex for connectors made by molex and the pin headers in 2.54mm pitch are in “Connector_PinHeader_2.54mm”)
There are multiple options to assign footprints to a symbol. All of them are documented in my tutorial How can i assign a footprint to a symbol? and the whole process is also part of my beginners tutorial Tutorial: Introduction to PCB design with KiCad version 5.1 (Getting Started)
If this does not help then the least you should do is provide a screenshot of the assign footprint tool (in the past known as cvpcb). Or if you use a different tool then a screenshot of that.
And as you mention version 4, have a look at this just in case you have a mixed library setup I had KiCad 4 installed previosly. Now i updated to v5. Now i have some problems with the library setup